Is Elementary School Cheerleading a Raison d’Etre?

One of the great and endless challenges of family law is trying to imbue in clients a sense of perspective. Thankfully, most people have little contact with the judicial system, but when they do have an “issue” they expect the court’s undivided attention. Fair enough, but they miss the fact that the judge who is hearing their custody dispute this afternoon took a murder plea in the morning followed by an argument over whether the local hospital that serves the community should remain tax exempt.

After a bite to eat and a quick check on whether Gus the Groundhog was paying off on Jackpot Spectacular or whether her kid made honor society, the judge picks up the afternoon list. And on it is a case like N.J.D. v. F.T.

Some Type A judges have already read the pleadings. Others like some adventure. Counsel for both sides are invited to the judge’s offices or robing room behind the courtroom and the judge asks: “So what brings you lawyers in this afternoon?”  In this case, counsel for the mother of two children ages 7 and 10 replies: “Your honor Father is not supporting the children in their football and cheerleading programs. Custody needs to be modified.

Let’s roll the tape backward. 9:30 AM today was the son who bludgeoned his mother to death because she did something to anger him. Guilty plea. An hour later was an hour of argument over whether “County Hospital” should pay $600,000 in property taxes. The hospital says it will go under if it has to pay taxes. The County, township and the school district argue that hospitals aren’t really charities anymore. Then lunch. Lottery ticket. School website check. And now, will the court allow a parent to ruin childhood for two elementary school kids by letting a father ignore “mandatory practices” for kids in second and fifth grades?

In August 2024 a Lycoming County trial judge was confronted with this matter. I can’t speak for what else he had scheduled that day or that week but he/she heard a case where the core issues were relocation, football and cheerleading. In the end the decision was that the children were to be pulled from their enrollment in the Jersey Shore Bulldog youth program in Lycoming County and transferred to the Seven Sorrows program in Dauphin County. Mom would have primary custody and Father would have most of the summers except for Mom’s annual journey to see family in California.

Those readers with children can probably sense the “issue.” Football and its supportive cheerleading are Fall sports. But, modern children cannot arrive on the gridiron in late August. There are many practices to be had before the games and the cheering begin. Sensing this, the trial judge was explicit. The kids had to be brought to all “mandatory” pre-season activities but not optional events. And thus the proverbial “pre-season” games begin.

Mom filed for reconsideration. Practices start in late July and run through August. These were not “mandatory” per se, but the entire world knows that a kid who is not dressing for practice in August is an unlikely candidate to be on the field in September. The trial court relented and scheduled a hearing in late October to take up Mom’s request for more time to make certain the “almost mandatory” pre-season schedule was met. At that hearing Mom produced both the football and cheerleading coaches to help “coach” the judge through the matter of how important pre-season practice was. Ironically, neither witness really came through in support of mom’s theory. Both coaches said that pre-season was important but that it was not going to adversely affect the extent to which the kids could be involved during the season.

On reconsideration, it appears Mom got some extra time in July but the judge did not budge (forgive the gratuitous alliteration) on the “almost mandatory” practices. Mother appealed. Part of her argument was that despite the remarks of the children that they did not have enough time with their Father, Father’s reluctance to drive them to their non-mandatory practice in August several times a week was affecting their athletic preparedness. The trek to and from practice for Dad would have been more than 2 hours each way.

The Superior Court affirmed. Other than the five days leading up to school and vacation with Mother, summer was staying with Father and he would decide on the pre-season involvement. On appeal both sides had counsel which suggests that there were lawyers present for the trial. But the clear signal one gets from reading this case was that “activities” were as, if not more important, than unfettered time with a non-custodial parent.

Almost all children stuggle when their parents fight. And many seek solace in school or athletic activities as a safe harbor where the struggle can be set aside. But here are elementary school kids who not only have to come to testify in their parents’ dispute but they are greeting their coaches in the courthouse halls as the latter go in to testify. A judge and a court staff that juggle criminal, civil and juvenile matters of grave importance are now asked to spend time listening to whether F.D. is missing tackles in September while N.D.’s cartwheels are not landing right.

We all want what is best for our kids. But we all can lose perspective over the fact that childhood development is a process and not a result. We are living in an age where everything adults do is being measured by results. For kids, who have minds and bodies that are only starting to develop, there is real danger associated with maximizing anything. If your sixteen-year-old can run 50 yards in 7 seconds perhaps some summertime on the gridiron is a solid investment. Unfortunately, adults are inclined to project their former athletic aspirations onto children who can’t cope with the pressure. That’s something to discuss with your attorney before the custody battles begin.

N.B. For readers who may have geographic challenges (e.g., those in the Philadelphia area) Jersey Shore is a community in Western Pennsylvania in addition to the place all Philadelphians go in summer. Second, we cannot help but observe the irony of participation something called the Seven Sorrows Cheerleading squad.

7 W.D.A. 2025 (June 10. 2025)

https://www.pacourts.us/assets/opinions/Superior/out/J-A11041-25m%20-%20106400285314522638.pdf?cb=1